The Pam Ward Chronicles Award Show!

Tuesday, December 04, 2007


Who will win the coveted golden mic? It's anyone's game at this point. But Before we get into the awards and final tally here were the Top 10 from Week 14.

10. "I'm sure you've done a couple of Patriots games in your day. I would tell every young Quarterback to watch how Peyton, excuse me Tom Brady utilizes the pocket to his advantage."- Boomer Esiason

9. "He said he was a chubby little red baby."- Ray Bentley on Central Michigan LB Red Keith

8. "The SEC Title Game Tennessee and Louisville, or LSU."- Andre Ware

7. "If they throw it to the left side of the end zone, they've got a good shot at hitting you. That'd be funny." - Brad Nessler to Paul Maguire (Via S2N)

6. "An Oklahoma win over Mizzou would create a cobweb of worms."- Craig James (Via Hawkeye State)

5. "They didn't call me I was in Gameplan."- Boomer Esiason
"Yes, a DeNiro like performance from you, and a stretch playing yourself."- Ian Eagle

4. "What did he say about tackling Jonathan Stewart? You have to bring your big boy pads?"- Dan Fouts
"It's like going bear hunting with a stick."- Tim Brant

3. "WHAT?!?! Okay we're back."- Pam Ward

2. "A fresh set of downs for the Steelers."- Mike Patrick

1. "Eric Ainge busted one. Watch the inside rub here."- Gary Danielson
_____________________________________

The Sexual Tension Quote of the Year: "You finally shaved it off do you feel naked right now?"- Pam Ward to Ray Bentley (Week 8)

The Captain Obvious Quote of the Year: "Florida State has a chance to win this game by outscoring the Gators."- Lee Corso (Week 13)

The "I Have No Idea What I'm Saying But I'm Going With It Anyway" Quote of the Year (tie):

"If you're trying to run it without running inside, it's like having nip/tuck surgery without anesthetic."- Gary Danielson (Week 3)

"There's Robin of Locksley, taken the poor and giving them to the rich, and the Illini are rich with talent right now."- Ray Bentley on Illinois Offensive Coordinator Mike Locksley (Week 7)

"The Cavaliers come in here, and they're like, you know, your uncle that shows up to a party and has too much, and ends up putting the lampshade on his head."- Mark Jones (Week 11)

The Completely Random Quote of the Year (tie): "Well I know Lynn is probably watching happily at home, ready to drop twins anyday now."- Chris Spielman (Week 2)

Bob Griese mentions Brad Nessler's Pink Tie: "Thank you, it's for Breast Awareness Month."- Brad Nessler (Week 8)

The "I Have No Idea What The Rules Of Football Are" Quote Of The Year: "Foster runs it outside down the dieline and is bumped out of bounds and will stop the clock. Well, the clock's not running. Oh yeah, we're in overtime."- Craig Bolerjack

The Burn of the Year: "Good to see Rob Stone's Curves workout pan out....he can lift up the milk can, that was nice."- Chris Spielman (Week 9)

The Overly Sexual Quote of the Year (tie): "He Face Raped Him!"- Dave Lapham (Week 7)

"Did you see any of those events in 1969?"- Ron Franklin
"I was in my mom most of 1969."- Ed Cunningham

THE QUOTE OF THE YEAR: "What's Britney doing with her life?"- Mike Patrick
__________________________________

Final Pammy Standings And Your Winner Of The First Annual Pammy Golden Mic Award Goes To....


1. Gary Danielson (60)
2. Brad Nessler (53)
3. Mike Patrick (52)
4. Pam Ward (45)
5. Chris Spielman (44)
6. Andre Ware (34)
7. Lee Corso (31)
8. Paul Maguire (27)
9. Dave Pasch (26)
10. Bob Griese, Tim Brant (23)

Others Receiving Votes: Brent Musburger (21), Kirk Herbstreit (20), Verne Lundquist (20), Pat Haden (19), Ray Bentley (18), Craig James (16.5), Mark Jones (16), Ed Cunningham (14), Bill Curry (13), Erin Andrews (11), Dave Lapham (10), Gerry Dinardo (9), Dave Lamont (9), David Norrie (9), Lou Holtz (9), Tom Hart (8), Todd Blackledge (7), Mellissa Knowles (7), Thom Brennaman (7), Sean McDonough (7), Ian Eagle (6), John Saunders (6), Quint Kessenich (6), Holly Rowe (5), Desmond Howard (5), Charles Arbuckle (5), Mike Tirico (4), Dan Fouts (4), Doug Flutie (3.5), Jim Donnan (3), Eric Collins (2), Jim Kelly (1), Craig Bolerjack (1), Boomer Esiason (1)

That's right folks it's CBS Sports' Gary Danielson!!! It was a great year all around and I thank each and every one of you for taking the time to email or comment with your favorites. I've probably missed a good number going back through so feel free to add any I missed in the comments. We're onto the Bowl Season now and hopefully I can remove the foot from my mouth after the comments I made about Danielson at the beginning of the season.

I did a bad thing....I'm sorry I did that. Gary Danielson is again the winner of the first ever Pammy Award. Time to celebrate with some wings!



To review all of the old Chronicles week by week Click Here

Posted by Awful Announcing- at 2:35 PM

20 Comments:

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CresceNet said...
Dec 4, 2007, 3:38:00 PM  

I'm so disappointed in Spielman...I thought he was a lock to win.

GMoney said...
Dec 4, 2007, 3:56:00 PM  

crescenet -100

Awful announcing +100000000

Anonymous said...
Dec 4, 2007, 4:07:00 PM  

You could cut the sexual tension between Pam Ward and Ray Bentley with a chainsaw.

Dec 4, 2007, 4:10:00 PM  

College football = more gooder with Pammy Awards.

The 1969 comment is fantastic.

Justin Williams said...
Dec 4, 2007, 4:14:00 PM  

Mike Patrick's Britney line of thought should've been enough to put him over the top.
He also tried to start another weird topic during the WVU-Pitt game but got cut off near the end of the game.

Anonymous said...
Dec 4, 2007, 4:43:00 PM  

What a glorious season of bad announcing captured.

Is it wrong to look forward to bowl season solely to exercise the use of "The Greatness That Is Andre Ware" and "The Greatness That Is Charles Davis" tags again?

Signal to Noise said...
Dec 4, 2007, 5:01:00 PM  

It's not "Britney Spears." It's just "Britney."

"What is Britney doing with her life."

That's why it was so funny--because Patrick's partner had no idea which Britney he was referring to.

Anonymous said...
Dec 4, 2007, 5:11:00 PM  

Good call Anon....fixed.

Dec 4, 2007, 5:18:00 PM  

I was also ready to take down CresceNet's post but he/she seemed to take so much time on it. It stays.

Dec 4, 2007, 5:19:00 PM  

Nice Imus reference there at the end, AA. Maybe he'll win it next year.

Bruce said...
Dec 4, 2007, 5:28:00 PM  

espn's link to the cabrera trade goes to an article about the redsox and yankees going for santana. even when they arent trying to talk about them they do

Mike Georger said...
Dec 4, 2007, 6:40:00 PM  

still does
but now theres a santana picture with cabrera and willis. makes sense. assholes

Mike Georger said...
Dec 4, 2007, 7:01:00 PM  

Can we give an honorable mention in the "Don't know the rules of football" category to every announcer who ever questioned why a team doesn't decline a delay of game before a punt? Its a bloody dead ball foul, and can't be declined. This isn't that hard!

RandomRanting said...
Dec 4, 2007, 7:18:00 PM  

Congratulations, Gary! I think.

And don't click on the link to CresceNet! I have a bad feeling about it. It's probably a hoax site trying to take your money.

Desmond said...
Dec 4, 2007, 8:34:00 PM  

I thought 'WHAT?!?! Okay, we're back.' would have been higher that third considering I only saw the clip through this site. This is what happens when living in Canada.

Does she normally call the MPC Computer Bowl or Humanitarian Bowl or whatever it's called from the Smurf Turf in Boise?

Anonymous said...
Dec 4, 2007, 11:22:00 PM  

If you wanna start one up for basketball, Dickie V has an early one. He says, "the defense beat him to the spot. That's called beating him to the spot."

Jameson Fleming said...
Dec 4, 2007, 11:49:00 PM  

I think it is time for another sports channel.. these folks are getting too lazy and it doent help if your "broadcasters" are all ex players and coaches. I wouldnt want to be in Broadcasting 101 in college.. You dont have a shot at a job.

Dec 5, 2007, 7:42:00 AM  

You're excused blog imus

HadesGigas said...
Dec 5, 2007, 9:23:00 AM  

That was brilliant. And the chicken wing picture. It doesn't get any better than that! Good work, I hate Gary Danielson as much as anyone, but you could have ol' little hands Verne Lundquists' 63 courtesy laughs a game. Seriously, next time you see them do a game, look at Verne's hands, they are freakishly small....I'm bored in life, obviously.

TD said...
Dec 8, 2007, 6:24:00 PM  

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